The Freedom of Contentment
The Framework
Imagine four quadrants with comfort on one the horizontal axis and freedom on vertical. Up is more freedom, to the right is more comfort.
The bottom right corner would be the CEO who has all the comfort of flying private, eating well, and having access to everything. But her schedule is full and has no time for family or hobbies. Indra Nooyi, the former CEO of Pepsi spoke very openly about how different it was to balance her personal and professional life. Her husband, “Raj always said your list is Pepsico, Pepsico, Pepsico, your two kids, your mom, and then the bottom of the list is me.” Her daughter had to call her assistants who would have to answer questions because her mom was too busy as CEO.
In the bottom left corner would a prisoner. They have no freedom since they are incarcerated and they have no comforts.
The top left corner would be lots of freedom but no comfort. This may be people on an alternative path. Ski bum and van life would probably fit in there.
The final corner, top right, would be lots of freedom as well as comfort. That is probably what most of us strive for. I think of people who do whatever they want because they found a perfect niche that earns them money or they are already financial independent. Mr. Beast lives his dream of producing Youtube videos.
Nearly all of us strike out to have lots of comfort and lots of freedom, however we get tripped up and think our freedom and comfort is right around the corner. Surely a promotion will help me escape the rat race. This massage chair will certainly alleviate my stress. You blink and realize a few years have passed and you’re no closer to freedom. The amount of stuff you have has increased, but you still don’t feel comfortable.
Another Dimension - Contentment
Now, you could layer in more dimensions into this framework, but for this article I will add just one more. In one direction you have contentment and in the other you have the love of money (or other object, but likely money). Are those really in conflict? From what I’ve seen I’d say yes. When someone is in full pursuit of something they have trouble being content until they get it and then once they get it, it is onto the next thing. In careers, in cars, in anything people want, there’s always a next thing in line. I think that’s why the path to a good job is so rigid. Do well in school to get into a good college, do well in college to get a good job. Work hard and get promoted until you die. Even winning NBA stars struggle. Kevin Durant “thought a championship would change everything and found out it doesn’t. He was not fulfilled.”
The Bible has a lot to say about the love of money.
For the love of money is the root of all evil - 1 Timothy 6:10
Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have - Hebrews 13:5
No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money. - Matthew 6:24
But it also has examples of contentment. Paul was a prisoner when he expressed his contentment.
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. - Philippians 4:12-13
If a prisoner is able to find contentment, then I believe it is possible in all four quadrants. If we have a love for money then we will not consider ourselves comfortable nor free.
Still not convinced?
There’s a great story about an American businessman and Mexican fisherman. I recommend reading it here, but I’ll summarize. The fisherman is laid back, just doing enough to get by and enjoy his time with his family. The American suggests it would be better to fish more, turn it into a full operation, IPO and get rich so that in many years he can kick back and live the life he already is.
The story of Heller and Vonnegut at a billionaire’s party puts it starkly. “Joe, how does it make you feel to know that our host only yesterday may have made more money than your novel ‘Catch-22’ has earned in its entire history?” And Joe said, “I’ve got something he can never have.” And I said, “What on earth could that be, Joe?” And Joe said, “The knowledge that I’ve got enough.”
Getting to enough is not an amount of money. When surveyed people will say in order to be comfortable they need twice as much as they currently have whether they had a million or ten.
Enough is a switch in your brain. Enough is to free yourself from the love of money.
With a shift toward contentment you’ll also move toward the right on the comfort scale. Not because you are getting more comforts, but because you realize your comfort is already plenty. I live in a climate controlled home with an abundance of food and entertainment; I’d argue we’re very comfortable creatures. Would a king a few hundred years ago lived as well as we do?
Until you have a sense of enough you will be stuck on the hedonic treadmill. There are always better things to buy and experiences to have. Flying business class is better than economy and I’m sure flying private is even better than that. Having a boat is great, but a mega-yacht is even better. In fact, when in New Zealand I met a guy who worked on a billionaire’s mega-yacht. The boat wasn’t utilized very much but required a full-time crew of dozens. He said when the owner was onboard he was always on his phone making calls.
Now, reading this article isn’t going to snap you out of what we’ve been conditioned to desire for our entire lives. But it may make you think. I hope it pushes you to consider your next Black Friday purchase just a little more, ponder whether you really want to race up the corporate ladder, and contemplate whether you need a larger house. If your goal isn’t infinite riches then you might just have a shot of reaching contentment.